I hope that one day I can say that I can get past the PTSD. yesterday I had this moment happen to me again. I was at church and some one that was not father was not saying the homily And with the PODS That I have the man who was saying the Homily it just made me go bake to the place where it all started. If you doing get what I am talking about I would say go back to anything with “life altering” and you will know just were it all started.
So I hope that one day I will be able to stay at church why this man is there and saying the Homily. That is a good goal for me. I might not be able to do a lot of things that I have done in the past but as the old work coaches would have said let’s just take baby steps. Right now it’s going to be all about baby steps. it’s going to be hard and it is going to be hard but I know that they believed that I could do anything and I still believe that. Even the times that I didn’t think I could do it they believed in me.
However, can some one tell me how long this Post traumatic stress is going to last. I hope it will go away soon. There are days that I feel like I can’t go on. I feel like he has gotten me. I feel like life can’t go on. Then there are other days that I feel like I can take on the world. That what he did to me was a thing. And I can’t let “a thing” change my life. It’s not a person, it’s not a living thing. I can’t let it hurt me any more. Yet why do if I find it to be so much bigger then it really is.?