Life and the other things

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As I have been thinking about a lot of things I am some what brought back to this one blog. There has been so much going on that I don’t even know were to start and how to tell anyone. It might be that Life is just happening and I don’t know when it got out of my hands. Nothing bad has been happening to me. It’s just that I have been thinking about a lot of things.

I am finding that if it is an important thing that was or is being said to me or if I am talking to some one and need to understand it right now I have found that things are a bit harder for me to understand. it’s even harder when people would like you to get it right a way. It just makes it even harder for me . I need the time to process it and people don’t want to give it to me. I think that I just need time to think and get it. I’m not losing it or anything but it is just a bit harder to get important things right here and now. I have been able to hide this thing about me for years but now I can’t do that any more. No more mom and dad to help. So that is what life has been giving me for the past day, week, month or few months. It’s something that is just hard for others to get. So I have been in my mind about it and I have been doing something that I do very well and that is that I have been turning inside to me. Which is not a good thing really.

All the doctors would say that is a bad thing for me to do. it’s just something that I do. It’s just something I do and they know it. Yet, how do you not do something that you have done for a long time. Wait, I know, don’t do it. Make the new path that you would like to make. It’s going to be hard but you will get to it. The path will get better. Thanks to one of the doctors. You know who you are. What you say to me dose get in my head really. Even though my head is thick I do listen. And I do believe, what you say to me most the time.
Believing in people is still a very hard thing for me to do. I have not been able to do that for a long time. I still don’t do it with out some great thought on my part.

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